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The physical attractiveness of a woman in a relationship seems to have a far-reaching effect on her partner, not only on his emotional satisfaction or ego, but on his marital satisfaction.
In other words, beyond the enhanced pride and ego of a man who marries a woman loved and admired by many for her physical attraction or beauty, a study has shown that men married to attractive wives report higher levels of marital satisfaction. So, vying for and winning the heart of an attractive woman for marriage could translate into a happier home.
According to the study, the physical attractiveness of one’s spouse plays a major role in marital satisfaction for men. Meanwhile, a woman’s happiness in marriage is not affected by her husband’s looks.
In the study, titled, “Sex differences in the implications of partner physical attractiveness for the trajectory of marital satisfaction”, Andrea Meltzer, a psychologist, and her colleagues surveyed over 450 newlywed couples over four years and posed the question, does a good-looking spouse lead to a happier or more satisfying union?
Published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, the study asked them to rate their satisfaction up to eight times over the first four years of marriage.
What Meltzer and her team discovered was that men with physically attractive wives remained much more satisfied in their marriage than men without attractive wives. In other words, men care about and are more sensitive to looks more than women do.
Basically, what Meltzer’s study is saying is that spousal attractiveness is apparently much more important for men than women, and since another study says happier husbands could have happier wives, thus, a happy husband and wife could mean a happy home.
The authors wrote, “The significant effect of wives’ attractiveness on husbands’ satisfaction was significantly stronger than that of the wife, indicating that a partner’s physical attractiveness played a larger role in predicting husbands’ marital satisfaction than it did in predicting wives’ marital satisfaction.”
Interestingly, according to the study, the attractive wives also reported high levels of satisfaction, all because having a happy hubby made them happy too.
Also, a study conducted by a team of researchers at the Relationship Institute, University of California, Los Angeles, USA, found that men who felt lucky by marrying attractive wives were happier and more likely to care about their wives’ needs, and in turn, the good-looking wives were happy in the relationships as well.
“The husbands seemed to be basically more committed, more invested in pleasing their wives and they tend to work hard to maintain the relationship when they felt they were getting a pretty good deal,” study author, Benjamin Karney, explained.
The study further revealed that women who chose less attractive husbands, but focus on other attributes that are of interest to them, have more positive marriages. The researchers suspected that this was because men place a greater value on beauty, while women have more interest in having supportive, positive husbands.
According to Dr. Wendy James, the Chief Executive Officer of Life Consultants Incorporated, since the division of labour for a family’s basic survival has changed, in which case modern women can get jobs and support themselves and their children without a man, the key driver for some of such women could be to find a suitable mate, conceive and have children, and not primarily because of attraction.
Some men who spoke to Saturday Punch said they would not even need a soothsayer to tell them that marrying an attractive woman would enhance their marital satisfaction because they wouldn’t have to look at other women outside.
Reacting to the study, an educational psychologist, Dr. Bonke Omoteso, said even though personality and individual preferences are essential, being attractive is good. She said that it enhances the confidence, integrity and personality of men as well as commitment and love.
She, however, noted that marrying a beautiful woman sometimes comes with its own problems.
“What I hear most of the time is that men who are married to beautiful ladies have problems with them because the eyes of many other men, who want to have them at all cost, are on such ladies. It is true that it enhances their ego, they are able to flaunt them, take them out to events with pride, among other things. These factors may have a link with marital satisfaction, but the story may not be so sweet to tell when they are at home, which could make the choice a less desired one. Therefore, it depends on individuals.
“Once you are committed to somebody and you maintain the commitment, whether the person is attractive or not, there won’t be any problem. That is why a man who is married to an attractive woman may still break up with the woman to marry a lady that is not as beautiful as the wife.
“However, physical attraction is not what should be considered in marriage, although many do it to flaunt the woman. In fact, it’s like a competition among men to flaunt their women but a happy home goes beyond that,” she explained.
On his part, a consultant psychologist, Prof. Toba Elegbeleye, said it depends on what individuals want, explaining that there is difference between men who marry beautiful women and those who marry women that they are attracted to.
He argued that a man could be attracted to a woman, not as a result of the physical appearance but probably because of the content of her behaviour, which would be the basis for the attractiveness.
He said, “Not everybody agrees on what is beautiful because what someone sees as beautiful may not be what I consider it to be. That is why the person that emerges as the Miss World may not be the most beautiful in the eyes of everybody. That is the probable reason why people say beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.
“A man may find a woman attractive because of factors like character, good carriage, good poise, and so on, and any woman that has these qualities may not necessarily be above average in terms of beauty, but the man may remain undeterred.
“A happy home is realistic if the things that a man is attracted to initially are sustained by continued repetition and practice by the partner, coupled with other boosters in the marital environment that keep on sustaining that which the man is attracted to in the woman. Then, the man would be happy for it, which would also influence the marital satisfaction.”
Elegbeleye said there is also gender variation in spousal attractiveness as what is attractive to a man is not the same for a woman. “Women are more attractive to men that are very courageous, among other things, while men may place a higher priority on the physical attraction which influences their expectations and definition of marital satisfaction,” he added.
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