There are 10 common mistakes that
turn off the man in the relationship. Learn how to avoid these pitfalls
and be a better lover girlfriend and fiancée.
MISTAKE 1
Switching to “Relationship Mode” too quickly, Have you noticed how a
guy completely changes when you get past the dating phase and the issue
of having a relationship comes up?
Of course you have. But let me tell you now, you can control exactly
how he reacts to this. A man’s desire for a relationship depends
completely on the way you handle the early stages, starting from the FIRST DATE!
The secret to getting a guy is not about wearing a man down until he
finally gives in and submits to a relationship. It’s about building so
much intrigue and attraction in the early stages that he literally begs
you to be exclusive with him and this probably might end up well.
MISTAKE 2
Asking him where you stand?
Don’t you hate it when you’ve been on a few dates with a guy but have
no idea whether he sees you as a girlfriend or just as someone he wants
to sleep with?
Sometimes it’s so frustrating that you even think: “You know what,
I’ll just ask him straight up what he wants, and then I’ll know for
sure.”
NOT GONNA WORK
I want to save you from making this mistake now, because confronting a
guy in this way will send his attraction for you crashing to the floor
immediately all the hype of wanting to be with you drops. In the early
stages of dating it’s vital to keep your high value status. Guys are
prone to irrational panic and this will just freak him out and make him
feel choked.
MISTAKE 3
Listening to all of his relationship problems. I know what you’re
thinking: “If I listen to the problems with his past relationships, I
can find out how to be his perfect woman”.
But take my word for this, IT WILL NEVER WORK! I know guys who have
tried this too, it never works. Letting a man spill his guts to you
about past relationship issues makes you his therapist. And trust me,
the therapist role is very UNSEXY.
And soon he’ll be sharing his NEW relationship problems with you and trust me you won’t be in them.
MISTAKE 4
Agreeing with everything he says
In an attempt “not to make waves”, you might think that all you have
to do is agree with him and nod along to whatever he says. I’ve seen
this with both guys and women and it’s always a turnoff.
This might make you a great friend, but it will never build sexual chemistry.
Only a “challenging woman” can turn a guy on mentally and sexually.
By this I don’t mean “play hard to get”, which is the other huge mistake
women make in order to get men to chase them.
It’s so easy to have more choice in your love life, as soon as you
hear the simple difference between being hard to get, and BEING A
CHALLENGE. And trust me, once you do, you will be EFFORTLESSLY
ATTRACTIVE tomen.
MISTAKE 5
Trying to logically convince him why you’re both right for each other
Ever tried to convince and show someone why you would be absolutely perfect for them?
Yup, we’ve all given it a try.
Only one problem,attraction has NEVER been based on logic.
Think about it: How many times have you seen men go for women that
logically he knows are completely wrong for him?Why do those women
manage to attract guys so easily, even though he knows you would be
better for him in the long run?
Because these women understand that SEDUCTION is different to PERSUASION.
Falling in love isn’t about rational persuasion. Trying to convince someone they are right for us will never work.
MISTAKE 6
Thinking that sex is your only tool of seduction
Ever had a guy who pressured you for sex and then wasn’t bothered about the relationship after you had it?
Why? If he wanted sex, then surely if you gave it to him, he would like you more, right?
Afraid not. Men might be simple, but they are not THAT SIMPLE!
Because sex is NOT what a man is really after. Sex is a temporary
need that men want to fulfill, but it doesn’t hold them for very long.
In fact, a relationship that is only sexual will soon have a man looking
elsewhere.
Using your sexuality doesn’t mean simply having sex with a guy. A guy
may think he wants sex early on, but if there’s going to be a later on
you have to learn how to BE SEXY, which is a whole different ball game
and which we are going to talk about later.
MISTAKE 7
Dropping your plans for the guy you like
You remember those times when the guy you like calls you up, and you
immediately want to drop any plans you have to go and see him?
This is the epitome of NEEDY behaviour.
I’ve spoken to lots of women who are fine with getting attraction in
the early stages, but within a couple of weeks the guy seems to just “go
cold” and loses interest.
What’s the deal with that??
It’s because once they decide they like him, they suddenly change
those things that made them so alluring in the first place. They show
their hand too early.
Guys may not always be that perceptive, but they have a sixth sense for noticing when a woman is desperate for a relationship.
As soon as he senses it, he’ll slowly drop off the radar.
MISTAKE 8
Sharing all your insecurities and relationship issues
Sharing your worries about your weight, or your relationship issues,
or apologizing for your outfit being inappropriate, all spells
insecurity.
Some women will share this stuff in order to FISH FOR COMPLIMENTS,
which is completely poisonous to a guys chances of genuinely liking
them.
Guys love COMPLIMENTING, but they hate REASURRING women.
If you spill about all your personal hang ups and insecurities,
you’ve lost all the sexual chemistry, because suddenly he’ll NOTICE that
you don’t find yourself sexy. Give yourself more credit!
MISTAKE 9
Waiting for him to make all the moves
Even though we are in the 21st century, still many women think they
have to adopt a passive role, waiting for the guy to make all the next
moves. But hold on, you don’t want to seem desparate right? I mean, you
can’t be just waltzing up to guys and tell them you fancy them, can
you?
Fortunately, there are some ridiculously simple ways to pick out the
guy you really want, and STILL make him think he’s done all the chasing.
Sounds, good right?
All you have to do is give him OPPORTUNITIES, and make him think it was ALL HIS IDEA.
This way, you aren’t left waiting for a guy to ask you out, but you also don’t seem desperate. It all just happens naturally.
MISTAKE 10
Getting advice from the wrong sources
Ever notice how we often take advice from people who have the worst love lives?
Most of us get our advice from our best friends, despite the fact that we KNOW they are HOPELESS and just as CLUELESS as we are!
It’s like the blind leading the blind out there!
When you get advice from bad sources, you can end up struggling
around for years trying to get it right, and then wondering why the same
problems seem to reoccur over and over again.
Your love life becomes like a broken record, and you hope that somehow things will just magically be different one day.
Unfortunately, they won’t.
Not unless you CHANGE YOUR APPROACH. Who wants to keep fumbling around in the dark for another 10, maybe 20 years??!
When you learn the right techniques for creating instant attraction,
your love life takes leaps that would have taken you years to make on
your own (and chances are, you wouldn’t even do it then!).
I don’t want you to make mistakes anymore I’ve seen so many women
make them and I see the way men ridicule them just because they show
the men how vulnerable and desperate they are, that has to stop, how do
we do this? We can achieve this simply by changing our mindset about
the way we run our relationships and also doing our best to remain
decent and respectable in all we do.
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